Claiming my [cheese]steak

Hello readers-faithful! It’s been quite a while since I have written to you all but have no fear, I have returned with a mildly sassy blog that I will leave up to you to decide. Before the proposed section, I wish everybody a heavily belated Hoppy Easter and that it was spent with ones who are loved. The University of Scranton just got off of their spring break. While many of the students were flying to exotic places bought with others’ money, I chilled at home, sweet home in New Jersey and caught up with some dear friends. The first day back at home, myself and three other friends Bob, Ric, and Will all went on a grand expedition to Philadelphia. This journey had the sole purpose of finding the best cheesesteaks in mind with five different stops planned out on our route. We unanimously decided we would buy a single cheesesteak that was split four ways so that none of us would feel full during the travel time between each stop. Each steak would also be judged on certain criteria such as bread, meat moisture, meat seasoning, cheese, and onions. The very first stop was on the outskirts of Philly at a hopping place called Max’s and while we payed half an arm to purchase the cheesesteak, I gotta say that it was worth the price because this steak was THREE FEET LONG. Needless to say it was a decent start to our tour even though the cheese was virtually nonexistent. Followed by Max’s were Chubby’s, Dalessandro’s, and Tony Luke’s. Let’s start with Chubby’s; their steak had a moderate portion and cheese was decent, however the onions left much to be desired as they were rather on the raw side. It was then during that crucial moment that my friends and I all made the executive decision to purchase a beer to supplement this blow to our palates. If you must know, this beer was a regular Blue Moon garnished with a single slice of orange and it was divine. Moving on in our tour we came to the pinnacle of the trip right across the street at Dalessandro’s where the joint was hopping because the line extended all the way out of the door. When our cheesesteak finally came it was delicious; the onions were piled high, the meat was very moist and there was distinctly clear evidence of the grease oozing out of the cheesesteak as we tore it open. The grease complimented the vibrant flavor of the meat to combine into a mouthful of awesome. The next two stops at Tony Luke’s and some place that escapes my memory (which shows how much of an impression the cheesesteak made) were good descending action to the climax of the journey. Tony Luke’s was an undiscovered diamond in the rough because when we first arrived at the place, we all thought it would be terrible. The service was quick due to a dire lack of patrons and the decor of the dive was very lacking and dull. However, I was so glad to have been proven wrong in my suspicions that the food would be subpar because in actuality the cheesesteak was phenomenal. To give you all some perspective, we rated each stop on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being “I WILL DEFINITELY MAKE THE HOUR AND A HALF DRIVE BACK HERE TO EAT”. Dalessandro’s scored the perfect 10 but Tony Luke’s scored a 9.5 in my book. The meat on these sandwiches was seriously moist and that it was seasoned the best of all the stops of that day. In addition the onions were very well done and the bread was fresh and fluffy. The last stop of the tour is not worthy of being remembered, nor will I try to remember it. I will merely say that it left much to be desired, worse than Chubby’s on the basis of taste and texture. The meat, as Will accurately described, tasted more on the consistency of roast beef which normally would not have been a fault but because of the nature of our journey from New Jersey to Philadelphia, this resonated poorly with us. In my opinion the cheesesteak felt very fast-foodish, if I can even use that to describe the taste; if felt as if these cheesesteaks were produced in mass quantity with very quick succession. There was no love in this cheesesteak – no signature flavor or quality that made it stand out from all the other cheesesteaks, unless you count its lack of character as a distinguishing characteristic. On a side note and side dish, we got a side of fries that were pretty freaking good. Unfortunately we ended the cheesesteak tour on a sour note of fried goodness. Otherwise in conclusion, I would highly recommend anybody finding themselves in the area of Dalessandro’s to stop on by if the line isn’t too murderous, or you can also go to the secret gem at Tony Luke’s. In typing this entry I have decided to save my mildly sassy portion as aforementioned for next week’s entry so stay tuned for talk on destabilizing the central administration and hippy talk, and I use “hippy talk” in a very liberal sense.

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